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Merrie Melodies or just gay 'toons?




by Leora Broydo




Thank God the Rev. Jerry Falwell has stepped in to clean up children's television. Last week he outed Tinky Winky, FROM that perverted SHOW the"Teletubbies," because, Falwell pronounced, the character is clearly a fount of gayness: He's purple, the gay color; he has an antenna shaped like a triangle, the gay symbol; and he carries a purse, something all gay people do.


But Falwell's work is far FROM over. You see, kiddy TV is downright rife with gayety. Heck, Toon Town is like one big circuit party and has been for years.


*** Fred Flintstone

Evidence: His nickname on the Bedrock bowling team: "Twinkle-toes Flintstone." The show's theme song ends "...we'll have a gay old time!"  Wears an orange dress with little triangles on it. Hangs out with Barney far more than Wilma.


*** Bugs Bunny

Evidence: Often stands with hand on hip. Plays a hairdresser in one episode.  Frequently dresses in drag. Loves to throw on a top hat and tails and belt out Broadway show-tunes with his buddy Daffy -- who, it's worth noting, has a lisp.

[King Daevid notes: Ms. Broydo omits Bugs' history of kissing Elmer Fudd on the lips; Roger Rabbit is also seen kissing Eddie Valiant in WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT?]


*** Velma (of Scooby Doo)

Evidence: Always tries to sit next to Daphne in the Mystery Machine.  Sports that butch haircut. Has broad shoulders and wears thick turtleneck-sweaters and knee socks. Never once shagged Shaggy.


*** Popeye

Evidence: Eats lots of salad. Wears a sailor suit, even though he hasn't been on a ship in years. Does little sailor-dances. Dates a flat-chested transvestite named Olive Oyl. Best friend named Wimpy.


*** Batman and Robin

Evidence: Robin's nickname: Boy Wonder. Batman's real name: Bruce. Both wear tights. They're in great shape. They like to SHOW each other their "grappling hooks."


*** Peppermint Patty

Evidence: Has a deep, gravelly voice. Wears pants, not dresses like the other Peanuts gals. Plays a mean game of football. Likes to taunt Charlie Brown. Always hanging out with that androgynous Marcie. Wears comfortable shoes.


Nickname: Sir.


*** The Pink Panther

'Nuff said



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Good one, Admin.


Personally, I've always thought of Curious George - "the curious little monkey" - as being a tad on the "broken-wristed" side.


Not to mention, SpongeBob SquarePants. Well, let's just say, it certainly wouldn't surprise me.


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Barney is obviously gay. A dancing, purple dinosaur who sings with little children at a playground? Furthermore, he has his own tour - his own little broadway on wheels.


I can see it now: "Barney and Mr. Rogers spotted outside a Holiday Inn".


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lol Rocky and Bullwinkle, no doubt.


I have to admit, The Smurfs have to be atleast curious. There's only one girl in the "town" and she was always yelling for Papa Smurf - her big daddy, I suppose. Therefore, the rest of the Smurfs kept me wondering which way their door swings.


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One episode had them all fighting for her attention.


Let's face it, with all of them to choose from, I'm sure that she was able to let herself loose and do what she wanted (ahem) and not worry about getting a rep.  After all, the guys had only one choice, and if they talked badly, then they were only hanging themselves. lol


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